u could say i have too many doors open, and my leg irons wont allow me to get more than my head in each door
im tired of dealing with the now
the only thing i have to look forward to is the future
as soon as my condo is done in escrow, ill be gone
not sure where to though
im not sure if ill keep my workers comp cases either, coz they cant even get me treated properly
destination unknown
probably gona get a place in SD for a couple months with my sis
just to get away from here
then after that i dunt know
im gona invest my money from the condo sale
and sit on it for a lil while
maybe buy some commercial property
start a life somewhere
i worry too, but only because i have no positive goals that are within my immediate reach
im really just trying to keep together much of the time, its easier now without that bastard here
i didnt even smoke all week till last nite, when i was talking with my neighbor henry
we talked for about 5hours or so
just about life
its hard to see how people slow you down
i always seemed to do ok, if i didnt have another person around me, like Brandon or Chris
i had fun
i admit, but its too fun, when u have someone to do nothing with all the time
Brandonhad a reason though for what he did, his reason, “payback”
and he wouldn’t leave when i told him to
so i shove, and he moves, and then he tries to throw shit in my face
henry and my sis say i should just let him destroy himself, and laugh at him when i am on top
i was about 10min away from fleeing to Vegas for the weekend, to get away from it all, but as i settled down, and couldn’t get a kennel for neg, im back to being here and depressed
forcing myself to do what i know i need to do.
i cleaned up around the house today, did the dishes n stuff
i didn’t do laundry in like 2 weeks
but i got around to it today
its lonely on the bottom, but at least i know i cant hurt myself, except for my own mind
