Today I cannot stop crying. There is many things I need to do, that are all tied into each other. Too many variables for me to comprehend. I don’t even know where to begin, except that I need to move, find Doctors and practitioners to treat me, all on a really shitty budget of nothing. I am in a lot of pain. My brain keeps wandering, like its stuck in a loop. I know my end result needs to be me being happier than I am now. I cannot muster the strength alone. I feel helpless. I was hoping I would have moved a month ago when my dad visited, but other shit came about that required his attention.
Some days I feel like I have this clarity, but they are few and far between, and most definitely not the days when I need them most. The majority of the time I’m stuck in this fog of uncertainty, emotional chaos, and feeling worthless.
